« Un-welcome Entry | Main | Carving Pumpkins »

Dreaming Of Home

I didn't think it would hit me so soon. Friday I was feeling low, both physically and mentally. Discouraged. Friday night I dreamed I was back in Ecuador, saying hello to friends in Shell. When I woke up Saturday morning I realized I was missing Ecuador, and the my old life there. When I left, I figured I was ready to leave, but I also knew that in about six months I'd probably wish I could go back. For me, living in Ecuador was love/hate, and I knew it wouldn't last forever. The missionary kid part of me loved living in a foreign country. The part of me that is from the US got frustrated sometimes with living in another culture. It's hard to explain, but any third culture kid will know what I mean.

I don't think I'm really ready to go back at this point, and that I am probably feeling this way because of this strange stage we're in right now. We've been working on deputation, or fund raising, since the beginning of August. We are just over two months into it, and our goal is to be done in another two and a half months, at the end of the year. So far we have seen our monthly support increase to 75%, and we have $7,000 out of the $8,000 we need for our one-time amount. That means we are on target, because I figured we'd need to see our monthly support increase 10% a month to reach our goal by the end of the year. Despite that, I was feeling down on Thursday and Friday about our support raising. Not because of our progress so far, but because I was feeling uncertain about how we would raise the rest of the amount. Specifically, we've been letting our friends in California know of the need, and I feel like we're coming to the end of the support that we will receive from that area. That means we probably need to look for the rest of the support from the Boise area, and we are still getting to know people here, so I see it as a slower process.

But really, when it comes right down to it, I can't worry about it, and I have to leave it in God's hands. He will supply all our needs, I'm sure of it. God already knows what He's going to do about it, He just hasn't told us yet.

Posted by David at October 15, 2005 07:19 PM